Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Right vs Priviledge

My old high school had a weight room and above the door it said something like "using this facility is a privilege not a right". I have thought about that lately...

There were kids that thought they had the right to just 'hang out' out in the weight room and were so upset when they were kicked out. There were other kids that were just so grateful for the chance to work out at school.

So many things in life are treated like they are a right when really they are a privilege. We (myself included) feel entitled to far too many things that are not something I am entitled to but in fact something I am blessed to have. For example, there are mornings when I feel entitled to sleep in because I was up with Adele at night- when things would go much smoother if I looked at it as a privilege or blessing that there are times I get to sleep in. I would show more gratitude to Tyler, I would feel more gratitude in my heart for his kindness rather than just frustration when I don't get what I 'deserve'.

That is just a little example but it is a big problem. Lately I have been seeing it everywhere. This sense of false entitlement. This idea that we are all due something, that the world should be giving us what we want when we want it.

I have given a couple things away for free on craigslist lately and there are people that show up and are annoyed because I was not available when they wanted to come. And there are people that are so grateful and thankful for this unexpected good fortune.

If we expect things that should not be expected then when they happen we lack gratitude because we 'deserved it'. If when good things came our way we saw them as a blessing then we would feel a deeper gratitude. We would be full of gratitude for so many more things and have so much less disappointment.

This is a mindset I have tried to incorporate more lately and I feel like it helps me so much with my outlook on life. When I am grateful for my one car rather than disappointed because it's not two. When I am grateful for my one bathroom rather than frustrated I don't have two. When I choose to be grateful for the times I see my family rather than upset I don't get to see them all the time....etc.

It got me thinking how do I teach my kids to grow into adults that are ok being poor vs. the ones that think they need to come out of college and have what Mom and Dad have? How do I teach them to graciously help from others but not expect a free hand out? How do I teach them to be the kids that get a low grade and don't automatically blame the teacher?...etc

I think we are headed in the right direction (I just like having a game plan). I feel like it is so important for my kids to have a good perspective on life and how blessed we are to have what we have. I want them to be the kids and adult that know how to be happy no matter what life brings. I want them to be the people that can see the good in everything. The ones that work harder if life gets rough. The kids that take responsibility for actions, not just blame others.

I feel like in order for me to teach them to grow into adults with a good perspective at this point I need to make sure I am that person- I guess that's my game plan for now!

Those are my random thoughts for the night- sorry if they didn't make sense.


Rachel said...

Did that sign say "Using this weight room is a privilege not a right"? I think you may have gotten that reversed.

Great insights! I particularly loved the line about a poor grade is NOT the fault of the teacher. :)

Debbie said...

Don't be sorry, these are the kind of things that we all need to think about a little more often.

Love, Mom

kristenita said...

thanks for the reminder.
it's hard not to get sucked into the entitlement mindset since it is so rampant all around us these days.

Betzy said...

Thanks for the wakeup call. I can totally relate because I too find myself having to STOP and see the blessing (privilege) to enjoy of the things that I do have instead of don't have (usually wants). Such as enjoying the fact that I do have a daughter that wakes me up EVERY night when I remember I begged Heavenly Father to be able to have a daughter in the first place plus remembering that she will be growing up and not needing me sooner than I think. :-< Sorry for the rambling..Thanks again!